RELIGIONS WEDDINGS IN INDIA
Indian weddings are also as diverse in nature as our cultures and traditions. In ancient times there used to be Svayambars, where a girl used to have the right to choose her partner out of many grooms. They were given one task to perform and who qualified the test would be her husband and she will put Varmala (garland) in his neck.
Marriage used to be a closed family affair but over the years it has become a platform to show off the wealth one possesses. Indian fat weddings are very popular all over the world and tourists long to attend the ceremonies. Presence of foreign nationals has become the status symbol for the bride and groom families. Bride has to leave her parental house and shift to husband’s house and accepts the sir name of her husband.
HINDU WEDDINGS
A Hindu wedding is called Vivaha (Sanskrit word, Kalyanam in South India). All the homes of the brides or grooms are decorated according to their respective caste or traditions. The Hindu wedding ceremony must surround a Vedic yajna and three key rituals are almost universal. Though, the rituals in a Hindu wedding vary widely and colorful celebrations may extend for several days before and after the marriage.
So many different additional rituals are there before and after marriage in the different Hindu communities. Haldi (applying Turmeric) , Mehendi (Henna) , Sangeet (Music), Engagement, Roka, Tilak, etc. On the marriage day, the groom arrives with his friends and relatives (Barat-groom’s procession party with dancing and music – music band) at the bride’s home or other location on horse or horse ridden cart. Procession is welcomed serving sumptuous food and drinks (Nonalcoholic).
Vermala : After procession reaches the venue groom cuts the ribbon and money is demanded by the sisters and cousins of the bride. When bride comes to the stage they put garlands around each other’s neck. This is very important and oldest tradition of marriage.
SAPTAPADI: This is the crucial ritual. It means ‘seven steps, the couple conducts seven circuits of the holy fire (witness to the vows) a piece of clothing worn by the bride and groom are tied together, which symbolizes the knot of relationship. Both of them promise to each other to make the bonding tight and happy.
All the relatives, friends, neighbors come to take dinner and bless the couple with the gifts. After the Hindu wedding is complete, the bride leaves for the groom’s home. All the elders, sister’s brothers of the groom welcome the newly wedded couple called Graha Pravesh. After so many short rituals the couple enjoys the first wedding night. The bed of the couple is decorated with flower. Couple’s first night is called Suhagrat.
CHRISTIAN WEDDINGS
ENGAGEMENT- Traditionally the rings are to be exchanged between the Bride and Groom with the blessings of the priest and the relatives before the Christ on an exciting evening. The two families can be mingled through this ritual in that auspicious evening.
BRIDAL SHOWER- The bride cut a pink cake before her cousins and friends, all of her friends and relatives showers flowers on her and takes her out for a merry night.
BACHELORS PARTY- This is celebrated at the Groom’s house. The friends, cousins enjoy dancing, music with the Groom before the wedding day.
WEDDING CEREMONY- In a white dress, the bride has to set off for the church with the grooms’ relatives by the car sent by the Groom. She gets gifts from the Grooms house also. The guests can join an opening prayer, a mass prayer. The priest reads the Bible. The Priest gives speeches about the marriage and the bride as well as the Groom. The Groom gives gold chain with the cross embedded with the Christ, wedding saree flowers. After seeking the blessings of the Christ, the Priest and the elders they join the guests, hand in hand together as the newly wedded couple for fun, enjoy and dinner at the reception.
MUSLIMS WEDDING
The pre-wedding rituals are Salatul Ishtikara (match have been finalized), Imam Zamin-(on an auspicious day Groom’s mother goes to Brides home with sweets gifts and a gold or silver coin).
Manjha, Mehendi etc. are the pre-wedding ceremonies. In these traditions paste made of Turmeric and other beautifying herbs is given by the grooms family to the would be bride’s family to be applied on the brides body so that she looks beautiful on the day of marriage.
Nikah – The Groom sets out off with pomp and show accompanied by his relatives, friends come to the Bride’s place and welcomed by the Bride’s kith and kins grandly. The ladies sit around the Bride and the gents sit around the Groom. First they performer the ritual of Mehr, where groom offers some money or gifts which as symbolic importance.
The Maulavi or priest starts to read the prayer from the Quran. Next, he asks the Bride to pronounce ”Qubool Hai?” three times, which means she consents to marry the Groom accepting the Meher (pre-decided amount of cash or some gifts presented by the Groom’s family to the Bride to seek her consent for marrying the Groom.) Then the priest moves to the Groom and repeats the procedure. This ritual is called ljab-e-qubool. And after eye contacting each other, the wedding is completed. After that Imam/Maulvi reads our Nikah Nama (Social Binding contract) and couple agrees to the terms of the contract of Muslim faith and signs it. Later, the Bride has to set off for the Groom’s house and welcomed by the relatives’ friends. Rukhshat, Walima is the post-wedding rituals.
PARSIS WEDDING
Pre-Wedding Rituals-Rupia Peravanu is referred to as an engagement ceremony. The Groom’s family visits the Bride’s home with Rupia (Silver Coin) 5-7 or maximum of 9 coins along with other gifts. The Brides home is decorated with rangoli, torans, etc. Door is opened by the bride’s mother and she performs the ritual of Achoo-Michoo.
Achoo-Michoo – The Bride’s mother makes seven times around with a raw egg, a coconut, betel leaves, betel nuts, small bowl of rice, and a glass of water on a thali and breaks the egg on the right side of the Groom’s mother and then throw the rest of the things behind the house. Rice and water is put on the both the sides of the door to ward off the evil from house and family.
Devo – Mother-in-Law of a Bride light an oil lamp on a silver coin and give the wedding saree, bangles to the bride.
Sagan – All the female ladies from both sides mark the round sign on the foreheads of the Bride and Groom, placing a coconut on the couple’s hands.
Supra Nu Murat,(Haldi ceremony), Nahan(bathing ceremony)Wedding Ritual-Parsi Groom wears a white dress and the Bride wears a white dress as well. Both of them arrive at the wedding venue. The bride holds her father’s hand. Two priests utter the vows and both bride and groom have to repeat that. Priest then ask them three times in Persian language and couple has to reply `Pasandekardum’. Then they exchange wedding rings.
After so many small rituals, the marriage ceremony is completed and reception with dance music held in a Galla way. Lighting spiritual lamp, visiting fire temple Pag Do Bhanu all are the post-wedding rituals.
JEWISH WEDDING
At present very few Jews are left in India, and they are very adaptable by nature. Many Hindu ceremonies like Mehandi and Ceremonial bath have been included in the Jewish wedding as well.
Yom Kippur Viddui : On the day of Yom Kippur, bride and groom fast since morning and they pray in Synagogue that their past sins should be forgiven and they promise the new start of life and beat their chests as penance.
A Jewish wedding ceremony follows traditions and laws. KETUBAH- Marriage contract signed by the two witnesses.
Bridal Canopy – A traditional Jewish wedding ceremony takes place under a Chuppa (wedding canopy) symbolizing the new home built by the couple.
COVERING OF THE BRIDE : Bride covers the face with a veil and the prayer is said.
The bride is escorted to the chuppah by both the mothers and the Groom is escorted by both the fathers.
CIRCLING THE GROOM : After reaching the Chuppah the Bride has to walk around the Groom seven times. The three circles represent the three virtues of marriage righteousness, justice; loving-kindness. Seven denotes completeness and perfections.
BETROTHAL : (presentation of the ring) The Groom gives a ring to the Bride with the recitation of declaration. Blessings are recited over wine and then it is tasted by the couple.
SEVEN BLESSINGS : These are recited by the Rabbi or the selected guest.
BREAKING THE GLASS : The Groom breaks a glass crushing with his right foot.
YICHUD : After the wedding ceremony the couple are left alone in a room for 10 to 20 minutes
BIRKAT HAMAZON AND SHEVA BRACHOT : After the meal, blessings are recited over two glasses of wines and that should be poured into the third glass symbolizing the creation of a new life.
JAINS WEDDING
In Jain religion there are two sects Shwetabars and Digambars however, they rituals of marriage differ. Shwetambars have 16 rituals and Digamabrs have 20 rituals for the marriage. Their rituals are influenced by Hindu rituals depending on the area they live in (Karnataka or North India). Some rituals are common in both sects.
Khol Barana and Tikka; Grooms family visits Bride’s family with the silver place, Coconut, and some cash. Same is reciprocated.
Laghana Lekhon; when date of wedding is decided. Lagna Patrika Vachan; when the priest reads aloud the letter sent by the bride family to groom’s house.
Manae Devaru Poojai; Pot is placed in the temple and both the families worship.
Sagai; Brides family visit grooms family and applies tilak. , Mehendi, Bana Betai ; ceremonial bath for both bride and groom.
Mada Mandapa; Setting up the place for marriage, Thamba Prathistai, and Kankanan Katusthathu; sacred vessel is placed before the God and sacred thread is tied on the hands of ride and groom.
Groom wears sherwani, pajama. The Bride wears a colorful saree or lehenga.
Gudchadi- Before leaving for Bride’s place, the Groom is given his headgear and mother, relatives apply tika on the forehead.
Barati- Marriage procession is received at the wedding venue, the Bride’s brother and Groom exchange clothes, coconut cash, and sweets.
Kanyabaran- Bride’s parents present the Bride, to the Groom with one rupee 25 paise and a plate of rice. Granthi Bandhan-Tying the knot between the Bride’s cloth and the Groom’s cloth.
Pheras- The couple circles the holy fire for four times. The Bride walks ahead of the groom for the first phera and the groom ahead of the bride for the remaining three. During the Pheras the priest recites Mahaveerasthak as the seven vows. Then the bride goes to sit at the left side of the groom as a better half or wife. They exchange garlands. Ashirvada, Bidaai, Graha agaman (Bride is welcomed by the laws), Visiting the Jain temple, Reception, are the post-wedding Rituals.
SIKH WEDDING
The Sikh marriage ceremony is known as’’ Anand Karaj’’, this powerful Sikh Community never accepted the custom of Dowry prevalent in ancient Hindu community. Men and women were considered equal in the process of marriage.
“Anand Karaj”, the celebration of blissful or joyful union takes place through several days and it was introduced by Guru Amar Das. Guru Ram Das composed the hymns, Laavan, which take place during the marriage ceremony.
Marriage ceremony can be celebrated only in Gurudwara and only the baptized Sikhs or Amritdhari may perform the marriage ceremony. Marriage ceremonies take place in the morning and are completed before noon. The cost of the wedding is to be shared between the two sides as equally as possible.
Roka is very important ceremony which depicts the involvement and approval of the parents. Bride’s father visits the house of Groom and meets his family. By applying tilak on the forehead of grooms confirms his consent that he is accepted. Later same is repeated by the family of Groom by visiting birds family. Mother of groom puts chunni (Scarf) on the head of bride which symbolises that she has been accepted as wife of their son.
The Engagement ceremony is called Kurmai, held just before the wedding ceremony. The engagement can be conducted on a different day at groom’s place followed by ardas or kirtan, sagun etc. In the Sagun ceremony, the groom is presented with a kara, kripan, Indian sweets, fresh fruits dry fruits. The bride is presented with garments and sweets. Families and friends from both sides are involved and enjoy the langar or galla lunch following the wedding ceremony.